the power to resist texting and driving 76% of the time when you only own a landline.

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the power of not being able to feel pain during constipation

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The ability to sh*t actual bricks.

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the power to inflate your testicles to such size, that it hurts.

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The ability to steal, without getting caught, other people's pocket lint.

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The power to not wake up until you get 9 hours of sleep

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The power to have no powers

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the power to be able to blow air

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The ability to be bulletproof after you get shot.

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The ability to read Captch codes perfectly but not being able to type them correctly

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The power to ejaculate

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The power to become Santa Clause, but only on the fourth of July.

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The power to be able to run at the speed of light only when you have no energy to stand up

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the power to get drunk you are needed

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The power to sleep while you're awake.

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the powre to spel

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The power of making toast land butter-side up

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The ability to run super fast, but you don't have legs.

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The ability to heat up an object by 1 degree for every week you hold it.

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Having the power to see in the dark if you are blind

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mime-o-moid. The power to pretend to be stuck in a box, walk a dog and climb a rope.

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the power to write amazingly neat but only with invisible ink

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The power to finish work instantly but only after the deadline

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The power to touch the ground using only your feet

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!