The power to cause slow people in front of you in the corridor to walk 3% faster

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The power to paralyze yourself from the waist-up.

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The power to see through glass

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???q? ?o?? sp??oq??? ?nq ????u o? ??!l!q? ???

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The Power To Only Get Horny Around Your Grandmother

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The power to strangle yourself to death

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The power to stick your head up your ass

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The power to build Lego with incredible speed, but then knock it down immediately.

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The power to know the ending of the book before you get there.

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The power to digest food wrappers, but only once youve opened them.

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???q? ?o?? sp??oq??? ?nq ????u o? ???l?q? ???

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The Power To Make Someone Cry A Single Tear, Once A Day,

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The power to be extremely well-endowed while having sex, but only when masturbating

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The power to become a forensic paranoiac raving lunatic at will... HEY! YOU! Why are you gonna give my comment a thumbs down eh? AND WHY A THUMBS UP? Are you gonna hack my account and kill my family? OH YEAH! OH YEAH? I AM GONNA KILL THEM MYSELF JUST TO TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOU! BAHAHAHAHA!

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Delayed Reaction Man

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The ability to instantly friendzone yourself.

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The power drown in water

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The Power to lost your Dankness every time you Breath.

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The power to text while driving and dies of cancer.

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the power to complete math exercises

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The power to divide by zero

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The ability not to be able to make a bong out of a taco bell cup

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The power o know why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch

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the power to awesomely tap dance when you are angry.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!