The power to turn into an escalator

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The ability to run... AT THE SPEED OF MAN

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The ability to type incredibly fast when your keyboard is broken.

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the ability to stare at a cactus for a week without being bored

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The power to talk to animals and plants, but only to have really boring conversations with them.

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The power to have 50%-78% water in your body

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the power to fart the alphebet

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The power to be invulnerable to any type of bullets except lead and copper.

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The power is to think MEMEZ are so nonsence, Even if you ever kissed an girl.

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The power to to think there are images in the clouds.

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The power to peel a banana with your foreskin

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The power to be able to see words backwards, but not any faster than the average mentally handicapped person can read backwards.

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The power to vote in a republican democracy.

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The ability to be invisible but only while playing the tambourine.

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The ability to not be Batman

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The power to die when you change emotions

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Third armpit.

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The power to run faster that a chetah when asleep, but to move as fast a snail when awake.

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The power to correctly guess how old shag rugs are

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The power to breathe oxygen.

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The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

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The power to read the bible, and then learn hypnosis, and look at the bible again... Moral: And they say hypnosis is worthless because it is just suggestions... the bible uses EVERY single trick in the book, and the bible`s teaching lead to the "holy" crusades (of kill murder and rape across the world, too many died to count), the bigotry, greater intolerance to different people, and just now (Bush before him) Obama is assuring his people that this war is "GODS WILL!" And seriously, if darkness is considered evil... then no wonder Captain America and his men did not hesitate to kill and enslave Captain Africa and his people a couple years ago... And its still going on, thanks lord (sarcasm, duh) Suggestion: Most powerful force in the universe, and it is invisible to boot... daaaang im powerful.

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The ability to do moderately well on an exam while sharting next to your crush.

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The ability to open your window, and shout retarded things at your neighbors. "HEY! MY ASH SMELLS LIKE BANANAS!"

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!