The power to shit whole balogna sandwiches.

The power to writ a pointless super power but only when you want to.

The ability to be a 100% accurate shooter in basketball, however u get blocked every time you shoot

The power of 2 milliseconds of omnipotence followed by death.

how bout the power to shit bricks....

The power to read your own thoughts.

to make asians smart

The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

The ability to hear fish.

The power to make people work and read ????

Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

The power to spontaneously combust into trillions of microscopic kittens, every time you stare a cat photo for more then 3 hours.

The power to do anything as if you were god but only after you slay a mythical dragon and eat an Unicorn's poop.

The power to become a destructive green beast that demolishes cities, which you have absolutely no control over whenever you get angry or scared.

The power for chris not to eat spaghetti

The power to teleport yourself to the nearest exit location.

the power to glow in the dark during the day.

The power to become a carrot.

the power to freeze time by 10 seconds but in the process freeze yourself too - mleo1

The power to use your penis and testicles as a powerful one time grenade in case you get assaulted. (probably the most pointless power ever)

solar powered night-vision

the power to turn into amy rose

the power to resist texting and driving 76% of the time when you only own a landline.

The power to understand a joke 30 seconds later after the last person in the group did it.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!