to be on fire always.(even when u are in water)

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The power to make cheeseburgers only when your tummy is full.

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The power to put on a sweater when u already have one on when its 90 degrees outside but can only do it outside

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The power to kill someone by looking at them but you must be blind

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The power to tell people that you have been "gifted" with a pointless superpower.

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The power to die while dieing

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the power to inhale and exhale air

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The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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You can fly, but only while on a plane that's in the air.

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The power to have a magnetically attractive force, but only to bullets

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The power to think salmon.

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The superpower to poo at will.

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the power to see into the present.

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the power to control urine

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To have the ability to trip over your own "meat curtains" at will and make it look graceful... somehow.

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The power to give anyone a Kim Jong-un haircut.

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The power to fly when your touching the ground

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The power to not die in lava but only when you are cold

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The power to have super speed for 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 milliseconds a century

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The power to continuously and periodically turn oxygen into carbon dioxide using magic organs in your chest by sucking the the atmosphere through your mouth.

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To be able to turn into any molusk when in a lava pit

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The Power To Melt into goop when you eat Delicious food

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The power to shit brix, No wait.

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The power to fall up.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!