The power to look super sexy, but only in pitch black darkness.

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The power to see events happen 0.04 seconds AFTER they occur

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The power to transform into Forever Alone guy and not be able to transform back.

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The power to always find lost objects... right after buying a replacement.

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the power to see the future...but only the future of a crappy 5 houses town in the middle of nowhere..

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the power to fart in 7 different colors

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The ability to eat your enemies and get their powers only when your are starving to death.

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The power to eat mayonnaise , but only when you do so, you become able to breath underwater for thirteen seconds!

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The power of gentle breeze

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The power to automatically yell every action you do like in a Japanese fighting game, I once started doing this for fun, at the end of the day eveyone hated me, good luck. (OPEN DOOR! OPEN DOOR! CLOSE DOOR! POOL SHOT! CUMMING HARD CUMMING HARD! SONIC BOOM! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! TAKING A PUNCH TO THE FACE UPPERCUT!)

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The power to hate someone you don't even know

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The power to be AMAZING in bed, but only when you're having sex with a midget over the age of 40.

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the power to have sex with any women you want. with your whole family watching

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The power to heal people. But only sometimes and after you got a medical education.

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The power to change the shape of any object at will

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the power to hover 1 atom above the ground

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the power to search pointless super powers when you could be doing something useful

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the power to have a power.

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The power to hypnotize chickens

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the power to change the size of your thumb when ever you want

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The power to simply walk into mordor.

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The power to know when someone around you is about to sneeze but not the specific person

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The power to harvest the cheese off your wiener.

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to be one second faster than 5mph in any 80's arcade game using one finger to push the buttons

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!