When walking down the street, i try to get to a crack in the pavement a few feet ahead of me, and step on it before the next car passes me on the road

the power to dislike this power

The power to be AMAZING in bed, but only when you're having sex with a midget over the age of 40.

The power to heal people. But only sometimes and after you got a medical education.

the power to have sex with any women you want. with your whole family watching

The power to change the shape of any object at will

The power to become annoyed by annoying people

The power to make fish appear in pants.

Clairvoyance, but only when your mothers having intimacy with your dad.

The ability to rape the willing.

the power to wiggle your own arms in a weird fashion

the power to change the size of your thumb when ever you want

the power to have a power.

The power to simply walk into mordor.

The ability to enter a coma but not be able to control for how long

The power to transform into a tiger but only if you are showering

to be one second faster than 5mph in any 80's arcade game using one finger to push the buttons

The ability to say Chuck Norris is just a piece of shiuiiiiiiifweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeem999999999999kkkkkkkkøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøfhiihdddde AND DIE! Chuck Norris.

The ability to catch anything on fire, but only if it is already on fire

The power to explode the entire world every time you became happy.

The power to make short sleeves into slightly longer sleeves.

The power to erase your own existence.

The ability to understand what a drunk Scottish man is saying, but only in the non-drinking bar.

The power to always find lost objects... right after buying a replacement.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!