The power to kill yourself when you are dead.

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the power to evenly cook a hot pocket.

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The power spite flower

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The power to be AMAZING in bed, but only when you're having sex with a midget over the age of 40.

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The power to speak with death people..

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The power to pee ants.

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The power to become invisible, but it only works when you are using it for noble and moral purposes.

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MARIAN PRICE ISN'T DEAD BUT SOME SAY SHE'S DEAD INSIDE

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The power to fly, but only when you are less than a foot off the ground.

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the power to make sillet bang remove stains from shirts

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The power to explode the entire world every time you became happy.

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the power to start a new wave band with a neon Open sign, a single bath salt, and a wet Tibetan ritz cracker.

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The ability to say Chuck Norris is just a piece of shiuiiiiiiifweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeem999999999999kkkkkkkkøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøfhiihdddde AND DIE! Chuck Norris.

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the power to die 10 minutes after reading this comment

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The power to put out light from your butt

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The ability to turn traffic lights red in your lane and green for everyone else

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the power to fall asleep while being awake

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The power to live through torture.

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The power to drink clean water (because i think dirty water is ewwy)

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the ability to type slower.

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The power to transform into Forever Alone guy and not be able to transform back.

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The ability to cure someone of HIV, but you contract it yourself.

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the power to be able to switch tabs on your computer two seconds after your parents walk in the room

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The power to steal other people's pointless superpowers.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!