The ability to breathe oxyen, but only when in space.

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The power to run 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% slower.

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The power to stop people from committing suicide just before they do, but only by killing them...

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the power to fart out of your penis

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The power to greatly enlarge your penis only if you are presenting.

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The ability to know how someone felt exactly 1 year prior but you don't know why.

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The power to hesitate when seeing naked girl.

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The power to ejaculate only when you're greeting someone

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the power to shoot poop very far out your butt

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The power to exude spaghetti from your pockets, which is never stopped. The spaghetti keeps coming. Out of your pockets. Spaghetti everywhere.

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the ability to slightly change your facial expression. sometimes.

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The power to order stuff online with your dad's credit card

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The power to be instantly transported to Switzerland, naked, whenever you reach orgasm.

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The power to correct spelling mistakes on road signs

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Turn gold into lead.

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Hitler Superpowers. The ability to kill 3 million Jews.

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how bout the power to shit bricks....

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The power to turn anyone into a magical butterfly that can't fly with its wing but the only thing it can do maniacal is make himself fly.

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The power to shed hair

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The power to get hurt every other hour

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The ability to fly but, if you use it, birds start flocking around you and shitting on you.

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the power to make other people's left arm grow two inches longer than their right arm.

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The power to think of a useless superpower, but start typing and forg........ GOD DAMMIT!

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The power to pee glass shards, but it still hurts.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!