The power to smell like poop once every hour.

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The power to make any drug appear in your bloodstream at lethal levels.

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the power to see through glass

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the power to shoot superman

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The power to swallow chewed up food.

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The power to be able to hold your farts while you pee.

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The ability to only be capable of drinking boiling water, but still feel the pain.

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The power to endure uncontrollable & highly noticeable erections at funerals

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The power to shrink your penis.

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The power to be as strong as a bear... but only when fighting another bear.

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the power to turn wine into water

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The power to transform into a bronie

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The power to have wood when you wake up.

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The power to wipe your ass once, and only once.

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The power to get pulled over for going 1mph over the speed limit.

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The power to do flaming flying kicks by yelling CAPTAIN FEET!

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The power to teleport dead dogs 1 foot away from you once a month

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The power to have every superpower ever (including pointless ones) for one second every full moon, then have every pointless one for the rest of the time.

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The power to be able to tie your shoe halfway, by using your mind.

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The power to erase yourself from all existence and in the process rewrite history so that you never existed. Seriously, there is NO beneficial use for this AT ALL.

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the ability to troll the internet but never get a response

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The power to have the strength of 50 old people

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The power to do EVERYTHING backwards

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Ingesting caffeine gives you the power to be a normal, competent human being.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!