The power to RISE FROM YOUR GRAVE, only for becoming a homoerotic bodybuilder addicted to steroids made from white bull testicles, and eating so many that you eventually become a golden werewolf, a blue hedgehog or something like that...

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The ability to add any two numbers and get 5

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The power to make any can of soda react as though it has been dropped down a flight of stairs when you open it.

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The ability to cure anyone of AIDS for 37 seconds

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the power to insta-kill anyone as long as their dead

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The power to to kill chickens by touching them

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The power to feel pain while under anesthetics.

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the power to nit propely

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the power to see poorly during night time and considerably better during the day with the help of +5 glasses

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The power to be a dog, with Herpes, that smells like farts.

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The power to never finish your sentences because

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The power to eat gumbo with a fork.

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The power to listen to Meghan Straight talk

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The power to fap without satisfaction

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The power to make another power but remove your last power and that power chooses randomly what your next power will be by choosing one on the front page

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the power to lick your own tongue

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The power to fly, but only inside an airplane.

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The ability to turn into a hipster at will.

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The power to make things invisible...to you.

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the power to read word that are the right way up upside down, but not read words that are upside down the right way up

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the ability to kill yourself... twice

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The power of being able to fly, but only on February 30th.

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The power to transform into a sentient cup-holder

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The power to cook minute rice in 58 seconds.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!