The power to shriek so loud your own eardrums cause nuclear explosions

The power to assasinate people with touch from your finger, while you are asleep.

The power to change your mind

The power to have no powers.

the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

The ability to make someone love you but only if they are heavier than 300kg

the power to talk to fish but only if their belly up

the power to come down off a high but only if you have cancer

The power to uncontrollably say a pun every sentence during funerals

The ability to switch out elevator music with NPR

The power to sing "Friday" by Rebecca Black, but only on Wednesday.

The power to shag your best mates sister, and get away with it.

The power to create tree sap.

The power to shit someone elses pants.

The power to create wifi but only on the third Sunday of May every million decades

the power to have good enough grammar to phrase the fu**ing power you want to share without sounding like a retarded deaf 6 year old

The power to dissasemble yourself, but not re-assemble yourself.

The power to shoot billions of neutrinos from your hands at an enemy.

The power to read the minds of the mentally disabled.

The ability to grow trees out of money.

the power to let it not be rape if you yell "surprise!"

The power to use expired coupons, this Power expired 3 years ago

The power to see 3 seconds into the future.

The ability to be a janitor at Disney World

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!