The Ability to make everybody hate YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The power to smell thoughts.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The power to lose your hearing and eyesight/

thumb_up thumb_down +87

The power to hate/love/care about me because of who I am. Moral: Relax dear friends (you other fools relax too) I was born this way, and I love every second of it, I am on fire and this workout gives me so damn much pheromones and testosterone that I am gonna invite a cute friend and have a damn threesome! Why, because its a mans world... never forget that kids...

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power to delete the "missing a finger" comment on shitbrix.com.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power to know the name of every show while the title card is in front of you but only if you are holding cheap mango chutney

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The ability to be smarter than the average bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

the power to smell shit from miles away

thumb_up thumb_down +75

You dont HAVE to give my former comment a thumbs ups, I mean why should I care about your opinion and needs etc? Moral: But admit to yourself that it was awesome, or else you are just lying to yourself, doing ya a favor kiddo.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

The power to do reverse moonwalk

thumb_up thumb_down +71

The power to shoot your teeth at the force of a Nerf gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Having the power to see in the dark if you are blind

thumb_up thumb_down +57

The power to lick your balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

The ability to catch bullets traveling under 5 mph

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The power to be invisible but only to blind people.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

the power to have a dick in the box

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to eat as many ice cubes as you want without getting a brain freeze.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to have laser vision but it is 2 times worse on your eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to get your blackberry to turn on slightly faster

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The power to understand the farmer in Hot Fuzz.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The power to fly for as long the average human is in the air during a vertical jump.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The power to choose the next president of the united states of america.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The ability to walk on water, but only if you're Jesus

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!