The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

The power to change your own emotions at will...WAIT THAT'S A REAL ONE !?

the ability to teleport to th place you were 5 seconds ago, unless you've just been to a bank vault and just knocked out teh security gaurd.

The power to stop time for 1 second

the power to be incredibly charming and witty but only around old people and little children.

the power to know what time is not

The power to see every rainbow in double rainbow.

THE POWER OF WATCHING YOUTUBE VIDEOS but just with a telephone in hand that can reproduce videos

The power to turn all of the air into a solid.

The power to poop fast enough to splash your own bum.

The power to get mad horny instantaneously around children.

the power to shoot poop very far out your butt

The power to touch MC Hammer.

The power to read people's mind but can only read their minds when they are thinking about sex.

The ability to control when a certain crow caws, but only of it was born in Bejing,China and raised in Ansterdam.

the power to eat with your butt

My power is the strange and rare ability to produce nonsens....Sometime i steal, rip what i like...an newbe loan from others, an artist steal and know how to fuse it as new since all is repetition...Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. So...

The power to write about power.

The ability to read any language and understand it perfectly but only in pitch black darkness.

The ability to detect vampires, but only during the day.

The power to make santa come to your house, but he doesn't have presents to give you.

the power to turn into a bucket of water

The power to think of pointess facts at any given moment

The ability to sense a crime has been committed, but only after the criminal has already been caught and safely locked away in jail.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!