understanding every language only if you get insulted

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The power of coming back from dying but dying 1 second later.

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the power to inhale and exhale air

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The ability to see the world from a rock's perspective. Everywhere there is a rock you see what is around it. But rocks don't have eyes.

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The power to shut me the F UCK UP! Moral: Ironically I have not said a single word for hours... so that would be impossible... Now, if you hear MY voice when you read this, then you are either psychic or psychotic, which is not that different if you ask me... Now.. if you hear YOUR voice inside your head, then YOU SHUT THE FRUCK UP AND GET LOST! :D :D :D :D :D :D (A MoralMan Original, now this one was pretty cool)

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The power to immediately become comatose every time you blink.

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The power to lift objects that weigh less than a gram

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The power to turn expensive drinks into shit flavored milk

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The power to wear crocs.

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The power to melt into a pile of sentient goo, but be unable to move or change back.

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The power to speak in cursive

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The power to outthink the smartest people ever conceived, but only remember what you though for an attasecond.

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The power of being able to fly, but only on February 30th.

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The power to summon anything you hate. Moral: Relax I hate morals too, if you ever find a moral here, then its not the original guy.

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The power to glow in the dark but only when your really sleepy.

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The ability to live forever but age quicker.

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The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times, and just in case of trouble, you can change back by doing the same this time. (good luck jumping inside a sealed casket smartass.

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the power to find children extremely attractive

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the power to play a flute to summon a black leprechaun but only when your on the verge of passing out

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The power to see in the dark only when the lights are on

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The power to vomit every time you burp.

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The power to sharpen mechanical pencils and pens.

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The epic power of laser pointer vision.

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the power to fly but only about 5 feet above the grove, and only after you fart

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!