the power to lick your own tongue

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the power to read your own mind

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The power to defecate active grenades.

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The power find anything on Google. Except Love.

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The ability to write funny pointless superpowers down, but only on paper.

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The power to travel back in time to the 1800s but only as a black guy.

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The power to see into the past exactly one second.

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The power to think of hilariously inappropriate jokes, but only at dinner parties with your parents.

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The power to be able to insult that piece of shit Chuck Norris without bein... YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! *dead* And of course the ability to type you`re death scream and you`re status after you`re dead.

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Projectile Perspiration: The ability to perspire on other people, up to 2 meters away.

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The ability to stand straight up from a lying position, Dracula style

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the power to create buttered toast from your ankles at a full moon.

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The ability to summon CHUCK NORRIS, but only while naked.

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The power to read the minds of rocks

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The power to make other people hold their breath.

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The power to die

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Delayed Reaction Man

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The power to be stupid reading this.

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The power of becoming sick when you need it.

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the ability to smell sounds

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The power to teleport to Mars, but only when your not wearing a helmet and you must stay there for a maximum of one hour.

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The power to make Macs appear instantly, but be unable to left-click on them.

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The power to attract any women you like by ripping of your junk.

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the power to charge car batteries.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!