The ability to teleport into a wall

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The power to be a GOD with your imagination

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The power to create little lightning bolts, but only by peeing on a electrical device, you can create little tiny lightning bolts.

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The power to completely understand Monty Python sketches.

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The power that when you sit down you fall through the seat

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The ability to always be fashionable late

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the power to sleep while standing!

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The power to make large black men believe you are homosexual. . . when you are a straight male.

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The power to only be obesely fat.

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The power to become extremely good at licking pussy... cats.

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the power to pee for longer then a normal person

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The power to have ABSOLUTELY anything you want!... ...As long as that absolutely anything you want happens to be a pile of premium fresh horsecrap... Moral: This made myself lol, so it probably has 16 red thumbs by now YAY!!!!!!!!

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The power to change the tv channel only when you have the remote in your hands.

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the power of cosmic pimping with a space suit on!

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The power to become a frog when a snake sees you

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The power to make paper doves at above average speed but you can only make 4 a day.

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The power to a nokia phone.

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tha powah to haz pointless supah powahz

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The power to go blind but you cant go back to seeing everything

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The power to get hurt without a break.

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The power to have as much fun typing these as me. Moral: Of course you possess no such "useless" superpower you sad loser!

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The ability to switch out elevator music with NPR

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The power to have superhuman strength. But I have to jack off to do so.

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the power to count from A to purple

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!