The power to lick your own back...

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The Power to bite your own ear.

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The ability to not fart, but only while you are alone

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The power to read minds. ...of those who went through brain death.

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the power to change the day to sunday at 5:59am

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The power to be able to hold your farts while you pee.

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The power to kill anyone by hitting them gently on the forehead by yelling "I HIT THIS VICTIM REALLY HARD! I AM A MURDERER HAW HAW HAW! At least 2 times before, then 3 times after the deed.

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The power to solve every problem in the world. By dying.

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The ability to teleport into high security prisons but you cant teleport out

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The power to make grass grow at double the speed.

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Having the power to trap bugs with your manly body hair (chest hair, nose hair, moustache, armpit hair, pubic.......)

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The power to fly whenever you get a stroke. (The power goes away as soon as the stroke ends, so make sure to get all your flying deeds done while you still have a stroke)

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Super speed, but with super clumsiness

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The power to make ducks quack every time laugh

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The ability to charge my iPhone, by starring at it real hard while rubbing my nipples!!!

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power to be an alcohoic

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The power to know the word for potato in every human language... including binary (011100000110111101110100011000010111010001101111)

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The power to make any liquid luke warm (it works both ways)

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The power to turn your head 360 degrees

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The power to grow grey hairs whenever you wanted.

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THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

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The ability to suddenly realize you have Cancer.

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the power to go on the internet, but only when there is no wi-fi

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the power to speak in sign language.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!