The power to become invisible, but it only works when you are using it for noble and moral purposes.

The power to chew ass and kick bubblegum, but be all out of ass!

The ability to push doors marked "pull"

the power to run 10000 mph, but evertime you ran you were teleported to a police station and you turned into a black guy

The power to turn your pants into underwear, but only when you're wearing them.

The power to suck your own dick, by growing and shrinking your p3nis.

the power to become demented

the power to get wider by eating junk food

The power to murder rocks.

The power to sweat profusely on cold days.

The power the ability to read minds but only on February the 30th 1783.

The power to blow up, before a bomb next to you blows up.

the ability to blow yourself

The power to kill anyone by hitting them gently on the forehead by yelling "I HIT THIS VICTIM REALLY HARD! I AM A MURDERER HAW HAW HAW! At least 2 times before, then 3 times after the deed.

The power to smell any point in time

the most bunka busting mega ultra super duper large biggest most powerfull cool best ever strongest mightiest power in whe whole universe but dont knowing what it is.

The ability to speak to deaf caterpillers

The power to Silence everyone when they're saying anything

the power to be blind, but only if you're blind

the power of milking a cow aslong it is a horse that you are milking. the power to ride a bull for 0.55 nanoseconds. the power to kill 1 bacteria every 20 min. the power to spread herpes without having symptoms. the power of sharing awkward details of your bowel movements to your family at dinner. the power to lift a small cup of water. the power of falling of your face whilst knowing it will happen 20sec before. the power of inhibiting passage on the curb. the power to cause massive traffic jams without owning a car. the power of listening but not understanding. the power of understanding all languages but the one that is being spoken to you at the time.

The power to play FPS games in real life (respawning included) but lag a lot

The power to wake up every morning and have to pee

The power to make your self drunk using only your mind, but only while your driving your kids to school

The power to ramble on and on endlessly with no end in sight with the most inane of thoughts that no one can begin to guess when they will end or what the value or goal of anything so long-winded might be until you find yourself questioning your very desire to go living if you are only going to continue rambling.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!