the ability to die without any control

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The power to make cheeseburgers only when your tummy is full.

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The Power To Explode Only When You Are In Underwater And Not In The Earth's Atmosphere And In A Room Made Of Diamond

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Tits for a guy.

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The power to eat toxic waste as long as it is not toxic but die from non-toxic waste and stuff

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the power to teleport yourself to a volcano core

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The power to erase stupid blogs or comments

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The power to see into the present

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The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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The power to see very far with the eyes closed.

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The power to think salmon.

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The power of 2 milliseconds of omnipotence followed by death.

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the power to become retarded

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The power to give super powers to others, but only to people you don't like.

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The power to speak any language, provided that no one around you can understand it.

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The power to turn the tv off from 0.00000000001 inches away, with your mind, but it takes half an hour to actually turn off. This superpower runs out whenever you come within a mile of a tv.

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The power to fall asleep at will. But it's only active when you're asleep.

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The power to easily dodge any bullets from any weapons ever... as long as the bullets are made of cheese.

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The power to turn coleslaw into cabbage.

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The power to be invisible but only to blind people.

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The ability to fly 6 inches off the ground

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To have the ability to trip over your own "meat curtains" at will and make it look graceful... somehow.

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The ability to morph into someone else's left butt cheek

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the power to see into the present.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!