Hetsy overpay otay peaksay igpay atinlay

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The power to shit in your eye

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The power to save 16% or more on your auto insurance

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The power to turn into a rolly polly, but only twice a year and for 5 minutes each time

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The power to instantly determine when someone is a dumbass.

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The ability to unknowingly make people to read this sentence.

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The ability to get aids and stay a virgin.

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The ability to find any lost pennies, as long as you're Jewish

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power to be an alcohoic

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The power to make condoms out of pizza dough.

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The ability to see through glass

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the power to always do your homework but never turn it in to the teacher.... RESULTS=failure

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the power to stop sitting on the internet wacthing cat videos

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the ability to hav a gun but no bullets

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The power to shit brix

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The power to survive a car crash only if it's between 9 and 9.30 am.

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the power to sell jars of bodily fluids for $25 each but get arressted shortly after

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the power two float in the air for three seconds but only when you fell of a cliff - jesse

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THe power to become Hot Pink. Forever!

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The power to speak Spanish, but only to people who do not speak Spanish.

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The power to travel back in time! But only 10 seconds. But only every 10 seconds. And you have to do the exact same thing or the universe will explode.

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the power to poo every time someone asks you out

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The power to keep getting fat no matter how little you eat.

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The power to eat turkey with nothing more than your mouth.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!