The power to shit a blue agressive monkey.

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The power to tell time every other second. sometimes.

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A power to fly only when you are standing on ground

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the power to become friends with a plastic box

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Power to listen to Hatsune Miku while reading these.

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The power to shoot spiderwebs but only out of your fully erect dick

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The power to win the lottery, but only the december 21 of 2012.

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The ability to know exactly where every Canadian penny within 5 feet of you is.

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The ability to teleport less than 1 inch once a day

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the power to make elton john gay

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The power to make bones of your body disappear and make them reappear in the wrong place

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The power to clone yourself 1000`s of times times and fly really fast upwards for 10 minutes as soon as you die. (Your corpses landing everywhere)

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the power to make people's spleen hurt for no reason

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the power to eat when you have already ate from a few hours ago

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The power to make thing look blurry for your self

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(PS: Neo was the seventh Jesus, we live in the matrix)

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The power to absorb energy wavelengths, in the visible light spectrum, from objects and create a mental picture of the shape and color of the objects they reflected off of.

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The power to drink water and pee immediately.

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The power to fly upwards at Mach 3 speeds, indoors

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The power to fly with your feets on the ground

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The power to shrink, but only in certain places...

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the power to start a new wave band with a neon Open sign, a single bath salt, and a wet Tibetan ritz cracker.

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A power that makes your shits 10 times larger

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The power to add a minus to your bank account balance.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!