The ability to throw sacks filled with butter at Finn the Human

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the power to suddenly have suicidal thoughts

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The power to make you teeth yellower

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The power to realize that your personality is like a shithole.

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The power to troll the Internet.

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The power to speak in morse code

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The power to eat just 1 Lays potato chip

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The power to become paralyzed whenever you're aroused.

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The power to breathe underwater, only when your not underwater.

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The power to be a mistborn but only if you're on Scadrial.

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The power to make any woman have earth shattering totally consuming climaxes at will, but only if she's having sex with another man

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the power to die....

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The ability to see the world from a rock's perspective. Everywhere there is a rock you see what is around it. But rocks don't have eyes.

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The power to shoot blank bullet rounds out of your fingertips.

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The ability to become a paraplegic at will.

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The power to control your own mind.

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The power to uncontrollably dance to disco music

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The ability to move your own internal organs, causing extruciating pain

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The power to feel pain while under anesthetics.

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The power to meme 20% harder

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The power to come second in any race

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The power to read minds, but only your own.

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The power to increase the rate of plant and fungal matter growth by 15% by staring intently at it.

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the power to say i can bend you

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!