The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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the superpower of making pointless and lame jokes for which no human laughs (except crazy ones and apes)

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The power to eat McDonald's in Wendy's.

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the power to jump, but only on any surface

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The power to metabolize any radioactive material in your body into arsenic.

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the power to laugh at burials and cry at weddings

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The power to turn invisible when crossing the road.

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The power to see through walls, but not through air.

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The power to laught at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

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The power to become attractive to women. but only when your with elderly people and Sarah Palin.

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The power to be immortal until the moment that you would die.

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The power to make instruments taste mayonnaise.

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The power to see oxygen.

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The ability to walk backwards... backwards.

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The power to have razor sharp facial hair.

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The power to shoot glue from your penis

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The power to crap without pissing.

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the power to shoot fireballs.....only when your under water

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The power to be able to see 1 second into the future

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The power to flush toilets with your mind

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The power to have super-sonic hearing but only for one second every three hours.

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The power to slightly disfigure anything made out of macaroni.

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The ability to instantly make all your clothes vanish but only when you're in a job interview

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the power to sleep with any woman, unless your a man

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!