The power to be stupid reading this.

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The ability to metamorphose into any kind of cheese

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The power to crap without pissing.

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The ability to talk to anybody in the world, as long as they are within your eyesight.

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the power to read when you're not looking at any word or symbol

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The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

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The power to turn any object into food

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The power to to type Pointless Super Powers

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The power to become THE APOCALYPSE But you are NOT FIT TO SURVIVE....

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The power to fuck any person of the opposite sex, but you're incredibly gay.

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the power to ryme words with orange, purple, and silver but only after eating your own poo and while singing a beyonce song

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The power to magically generate drugs in your pockets, but only while being arrested or in a police station.

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The power to slightly disfigure anything made out of macaroni.

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The power to know what someone thought, after they told you.

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The power grow arm pit hair 5 times faster and 5 times longer than it was after shaving.

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The ability to instantly make all your clothes vanish but only when you're in a job interview

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The power to make awesome school lunch for the kids!

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The ability to cure polio, but only within U.S. borders.

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the power to gain the intelligents of forest gump, but not the table tennis playing ability

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The power of 12% levetation

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The power to tap dance awesomely, but only when wearing bunny slippers.

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The power of HONOR AND LOVE! Moral: it wont make you honorable, or lovable by the way.

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the power to fax people with your mind

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The power to laugh so hard you can't breath at "Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?" Jokes.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!