the power to be immortal, but only temporally

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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The power to make people feel confident in themselves.

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the power to get F's on assignments without trying

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Infinite knowledge when dead

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The power to melt chocolate at room temperature.

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the power to smell like ham

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The power to make food slightly smaller.

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The power to drink and drive without being caught

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The power to kill anyone who is 4 seconds away from certain death

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The ability to produce rainbows and yoghurt from your armpits.

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The power to answer trivia questions, but only being able to do so in a loud, aggressive voice.

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To the comment below: You wont get a chance to miss me mortal... Moral: The color of envy... you wish you could be like me... everyone of you, yet some of you got the balls/pussies to prove it! For the people! For the freedom of speech! For courage and strength! For balls of steel! For the ladies... and most importantly... because I f*cking want to! NOW AND FOREVER! I AM MORAL MAN!

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The power to eat your own head.

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The power to shrink your dick smaller but an inability to make it larger (even back to the original size).

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Meltman, with the power to melt!

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The power to do something for 8 hours and still have to do it the next day.

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The power to kill you self.

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The power to type in the wrong capatcha.

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power to breath fire but only through your nose

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The power to never die unless you become sick, injured, or breathe through your nose:/

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The power to change your hair's color to white when you're old.

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The power to torture yourself and you are also immortal but will immediately die if you are not constantly tortured in a way that is 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 times worse then you can even imagine and are so terrified of dying that you would rather be tortured for all eternity.

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The power to live forever but only in a coma.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!