DIY LOL
Anti Joke
Porn SFW
Funny Tip Jars
LOL Hell
home
Popular
Newest
You Decide
« First
‹ Prev
…
287
288
289
290
291
292
293
294
295
…
Next ›
Last »
The power to eat food a little faster. So when you are done you have to just stay there for 5 more minutes for everybody to finish
thumb_up
thumb_down
+84
The ability to fly, but only when there's no gravity.
thumb_up
thumb_down
+84
The ability to lift things up and put them down.
thumb_up
thumb_down
+82
The power to instantly kill anyone you start to love
thumb_up
thumb_down
+82
The power to always be at half mast.
thumb_up
thumb_down
+82
The power to suck your own dick but not when your horny
thumb_up
thumb_down
+82
The power to fry and suffer harder than anyone when lit on fire.
thumb_up
thumb_down
+82
The power to be able to make something usable but have it disappear when you try to use it.
thumb_up
thumb_down
+80
Having six fingers but only on your left hand when you are trying to wear gloves
thumb_up
thumb_down
+80
The power to produce fish eggs from your left eye
thumb_up
thumb_down
+80
the power to shrink 0.1 millimeter or grow 0.1 millimeter
thumb_up
thumb_down
+80
the power to solve any problem and answer any question or equation, you just have to read all books known to mankind.
thumb_up
thumb_down
+78
The power to run half as fast as whoever is chasing you.
thumb_up
thumb_down
+78
The power drown in water
thumb_up
thumb_down
+76
BULLET ATTRACTION.
thumb_up
thumb_down
+76
The power to die at will
thumb_up
thumb_down
+74
The power to fire lasers from my nipples.
thumb_up
thumb_down
+72
The ability to be heard in space
thumb_up
thumb_down
+72
The power to do a wheelie on. Unicycle
thumb_up
thumb_down
+72
The Power to fart extremely loudly every time your in a crowd.
thumb_up
thumb_down
+72
the power to speak fluent clingon, but only to the non-metally disabled
thumb_up
thumb_down
+70
Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)
thumb_up
thumb_down
+70
the power to be good at something your already good at.
thumb_up
thumb_down
+68
the power to get F's on assignments without trying
thumb_up
thumb_down
+64
« First
‹ Prev
…
287
288
289
290
291
292
293
294
295
…
Next ›
Last »
Pointless Super Powers
A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!