The ability to quit smoking by giving yourself lung, heart, and throat cancer, coupled with enphysema.

The power to eat soup with a fork.

The power to fart in public AT WILL..

the power to suck at absolutly everything you do, except at failing.

the power to become demented

The power to get laid with whomever you choose, but they look and feel like one of your parents.

The superpower to attract harm to yourself with twice the damage.

the power to be blind, but only if you're blind

The power to speak in only anime openings

75% levitation

The power to go super sonic speed as long as you are tripping

Vanilla scented blood

The power to urinate in any color- even rainbow color!

The power to steal other peoples powers but being the only person in the world with super powers.

The power to survive extreme temperatures, for extremely short amounts of time.

ability to levitate using my fart...

The power to teleport, but only to life threatening situations.

the ability to blow yourself

the power to eat anything edible but not if it's edible.

The power to recharge batteries by licking them.

The power to think this exact sentence at the worst possible time.

the power to fly, but only when you poop

The power to balance the light switch in the middle but only on the 4th try.

The Ability to shit studs once a week

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!