the ability to un-dank any meme

The super power of randomly confuse the feeling of being about to sneeze and being about to shit yourself

the power to stop masturbating every day

the power to awesomely tap dance when you are angry.

the power to take ipecac without throwing up

The power to detect homosexuality in animals. ~scramjat

The power to look like Stephen Hawking but have none of his intelligence.

The power to eat McDonald's in Wendy's.

The power to creat your own superpower that's by the way. POINTLESS

the power to travel 1-day into the future by waiting 24 hours

The power to communicate with sperm.

To be able to run the speed of light but only works if your standing still?.

The power of fork-throwing. This includes large pie servers, spoons, and basically any other utensils that are not knives.

The power to have super hearing but only works when you are dead.

The power to turn shades of brown or red, but only when exposed to the sun for an extended amount of time.

To be immortal, but injuries do not heal and the pain is 100 times more intense

the power to not die only when someone shoots you in your left heel.

the power to read your own mind

The power to smell inside of your own butt.

To fly.. into the zone.."Friend zone"

The power to expel a slight breeze after inhaling.

The power to create a unicorn online.

The power to forget everything u learned during a test.

Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!