The power to suck a golf ball through a garden hose

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The power to kill anyone by hitting them gently on the forehead by yelling "I HIT THIS VICTIM REALLY HARD! I AM A MURDERER HAW HAW HAW! At least 2 times before, then 3 times after the deed.

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The power to make money disappear.

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The power to kill anyone with your mind, In your imagination.

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The power to have no superpower

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The power to breath under water but only if you're holding your breath

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The power to poo without wiping.

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The power to open any trash can lid with telekinesis if its within view.

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the power to stop masturbating every day

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the power to awesomely tap dance when you are angry.

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The power to revive anyone....But only if they are alive.

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The ability to think why does it say write your own when you type it.

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The power to fall in love reptiles

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the power to travel 1-day into the future by waiting 24 hours

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The power to see water one meter behind you.

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The power to be invincible......... only when you are not in danger or harm.

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The ability to hear the opinions of inanimate objects.

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The power to communicate with sperm.

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The power to do control the atmosphere, but only in space.

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The power to deep throat a giraffe!

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The power to be able to see 1 second into the future

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the power to read your own mind

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the power to walk on land.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!