The power to become encased in concrete at will.

The power to be french.

The power to let someone control your dick

The power to look at Sun.

The power to jump over mountains but die when you hit the ground.

The power to produce a hand vacuum from your belly button that only sucks up lint for your belly button

The power to shrink your hand only when its inside a pringles container.

The power to run Crysis.

The power to read your own mind

The power to stare at deckchairs without blinking

The power to bingewatch an entire season of a TV show in only five minutes, only to not remember any of it and have to watch it all again through normal means.

The epic power of laser pointer vision.

The power of having a short attention sp-- Ooh shiny!

That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

The ability to stop only ONE bullet and ONE bullet only

The power to make Q-Tips rain from the sky every month

The power to be better than Chuck Norris, but you have to be in a lucid sleep.

The ability to not drop anything ...when you're not holding anything

yo mama

The power to summon a spray of bullets going everywhere in the room, and bullet-vulnerability.

The power to make clean socks dirty.

The power to fly but only in your room

The power to bleed anally at will

Reversed telepathy, everyone can hear your thoughts.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!