The ability to kill anyone, only if he/she is your close friend.

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The power to read terms and conditions

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the power to summon a pen, once

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The ability to know when, and which elevator door will open first.

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The ability to give yourself any super power, but you cannot use it if it is used.

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The power to make awesome school lunch for the kids!

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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The power to Rage Against The Machine

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The ability to be born, live for about 75 years and then die.

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The power to turn Justin Bieber into a cat and kill him 9 times

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The power to go back in time but only be able to go 1 second back

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The power to hurt other people by hurting yourself, and you both sustain the damage.

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The power to die at will

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The power to stay dry in the rain, while indoors.

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The power that when you sit down you fall through the seat

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The ability to spit mouthwash

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power to drop the soap in the jail shower room

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The ability to recall lyrics of particularly terrible music with perfect accuracy.

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The power to stare directly at the sun

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The ability to become visible at will.

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The power to turn into a tree.

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The power to instantaneously fall asleep but only when tomorrow is a day off.

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The ability to go blind every time you open your eyes

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The ability to jump

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!