The power to shit on the ceiling

thumb_up thumb_down +93

The power to control weather on Mars

thumb_up thumb_down +93

The power to survive underwater, while holding your breath.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power to whenever your punched you cry a lot of asid that burns your flesh

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power to move 1 second into the future. Takes 1 second to work.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

the power to read your own mind

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power to wish you had a power

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The power to swim on land.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The power to absolutely nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +89

the power to disappear up your own asshole

thumb_up thumb_down +87

The ability to look at someone and die.

thumb_up thumb_down +87

the power to ejaculate 69% of what you normally do

thumb_up thumb_down +85

the power to slightly darken the color of tree bark upon touch

thumb_up thumb_down +83

the power to get a massive headache whenever you look at toast

thumb_up thumb_down +83

A power to turn into an ant, but only one Time.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

the power of the home depot lisp... and as an added bonus the power of how the universe works lisp

thumb_up thumb_down +83

the power to read when you're not looking at any word or symbol

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power to only see glass.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power of attracting fired bullets

thumb_up thumb_down +81

the ability to walk barefooted on top of legos without pain but only as long as you don't know they're legos

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The power to break the tip of a pencil every time you blink

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The power to turn everything you touched into gold. A-hem. Midas, you listening?

thumb_up thumb_down +81

to be one second faster than 5mph in any 80's arcade game using one finger to push the buttons

thumb_up thumb_down +79

the power to become a duck but not be able to quack

thumb_up thumb_down +79

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!