The power to become the worlds most famous necrophilia pørnstar after dying.

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The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

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The power to make anyone you see look surprise.

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The power to forget everything u learned during a test.

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The power to bounce a beach ball with lightly above-average accuracy

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The ability when standing still you hover 1milimeter

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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Absolute Defeatability- the power to be defeated by any and all things physical and nonphysiological.

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An extra set of eyes...in your scrotum

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The power to pause time and control every person you touch while the time is paused

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The power to give the wrong directions

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The power to vomit every time you burp.

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Be virtually indestructible, but only to things your not paying attention too.

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the power to do a backflip but only if you break your neck in the process

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The power to absorb energy wavelengths, in the visible light spectrum, from objects and create a mental picture of the shape and color of the objects they reflected off of.

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The power to speak a language only you can undeerstand

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The ability to perceive the presence of light.... with your ears. (warning, blindness may effect abilities potency.)

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The power to eat anything, but always vomit 15 minutes later.

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The ability to seduce any woman.....over 200lbs......that was born with a penis.

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The power to make muffins appear out of nowhere.

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The power to phase through walls whenever there is a door nearby leading to the next room

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The power to be the best video game player ever but you have squeakers follow you everywhere calling you a hacker and saying there going to report you

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the power to teleport but then immediatly cr@p your pants

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The power to die and not come back to life.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!