- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to completely understand Monty Python sketches.

The ability to die on command.

The power think five times slower.

the power to fly, but only when you are in a plane that is already flying. inflight flight

The power to remove cancer from stroke victim's bodies.

to make your bowel work backwards

The power to fire lasers from my nipples.

the power to have super strength but only wile you are sleeping,

The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

The power to teleport......one nanometer every million years

the ability to only crap while on a toilet

power to drop the soap in the jail shower room

The power to never be tired, but only when rowing a boat.

the power to get a massive headache whenever you look at toast

the power to change people socks on command

All of aquaman's powers.

----the power to hold your breath until your die-----

The power to have your toe nails and fingernails be bulletproof.

The power to spit venom, but it misses 99.9% of the time.

the power to poo out of your eyeballs and they burn when you do it

The power to think up the best lines but forget them when you try to speak

The power to absorb energy wavelengths, in the visible light spectrum, from objects and create a mental picture of the shape and color of the objects they reflected off of.

The ability to be born, live for about 75 years and then die.

The ability to perceive the presence of light.... with your ears. (warning, blindness may effect abilities potency.)

Pointless Super Powers