The power to say WACKY WAVING INFLATABLE ARM FLAILING TUBE MAN - but only at peoples funerals or when taking a piss (but you uncontrolably flail your arms).

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The power to fall down stairs sooner than you should have.

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The power to convince two people I am not taking sides while simultaneously taking both sides.

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the power to fly but only during a severe hail storm

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The power to see through windows

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The power to change your position whenever you want. (I don't mean teleport I mean you can lay down while sitting or stand up while laying down)

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The ability to stub your toe on every object near you when walking.

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Tah Puwir tu wright currectili

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The power to live in lava, but only when your cold

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the power to do nothing

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The power to extend your pinky toe

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Have all the superpowers there is in one milisecond every 100 years (If your still alive)

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The power to see other peoples dreams.

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the power to extend commercial time while your in the bathroom

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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To be able to generate cancer at will

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The power to bet on the fastest horse in the track at a formula 1 competition. Moral: RUN FORREST RUUUUUUN!

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The power to uncontrollably fart when your with your girlfriend

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The power of omnipotence and omniscience but you work in such mysterious ways that youre both invisible and intangible and without will to do skwat. Oh wait that sounds like...

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The power think five times slower.

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The power to be immortal until the moment that you would die.

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The power to die every time you are standing on something.

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The power to iron your clothes with your mind before putting it in the washing machine

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The power to break the tip of a pencil every time you blink

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!