The power to pee while standing up

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The power to transform money into a foreign currency of lesser value.

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The power to type random pointless powers on a website for pointless powers.

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The power to ramble on and on endlessly with no end in sight with the most inane of thoughts that no one can begin to guess when they will end or what the value or goal of anything so long-winded might be until you find yourself questioning your very desire to go living if you are only going to continue rambling.

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The power to shit bricks, uncontrollably.

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Read fortune cookies without opening them

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The ability to push "pull" doors, and pull "push" doors.

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the power to be able to light yourself on fire yet not be immune to it

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The power to urinate in any color- even rainbow color!

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The ability to read people's thoughts but only in a language that you do not understand.

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the power to eat anything edible but not if it's edible.

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The power to only sit down and not stand up.

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The power to convince two people I am not taking sides while simultaneously taking both sides.

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The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

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The ability to get anyone answer your messages when the answer starts: What the...

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Nothing

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The power to shrink your hand only when its inside a pringles container.

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The power to control mealworms

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The power to do something while you can play games.

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The power to change your position whenever you want. (I don't mean teleport I mean you can lay down while sitting or stand up while laying down)

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The power to smell WiFi Signals

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The power to grow the pinky nail of your right hand

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The power to be constantly reminded of the game

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The power to control paprika with your mind

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!