The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The power to make only right turns. take THAT nascar!

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The power to transform into a paralysed turtle with half its shell missing

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The ability to understand everything about a language after 100 years of intense studying when you could be doing something more interesting.

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The power to melt butter with your mind when its hot outside

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Nobody in the world has super-powers.

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The power to have razor sharp facial hair.

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The ability to fart, hiccup, vomit, crap, burp, laugh, cry, scream and sneeze all at the same time

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The ability to telekinetically form crop circles in your own pubic hair.

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The power to have a invisible boat mobile

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The power of compulsive lying.

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the power to feel pain whenever you breathe

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The power to not see anything

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the power to breathe in space but have to be were there is gravity

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The power to be any animal you want, but only if you are that specific animal that you want to be.

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The power to fly downwards but only go down when there is a hole

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The power to control any O-shaped piece of metal.

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The power to drink 10 gallons of water only when you desperately need to piss.

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The power to think of the worst superpower.

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The power to walk at the speed of light, but not any slower.

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The ability to pass out at will.

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the power to see 3 seconds into the past.

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The power to make up pointless superpowers

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The power to transform your foreskin into rusty iron.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!