The power to make sweet love to your mother just by caressing her between the legs for a while.

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The ability to make cheese, only edible to vegans, but only on leap days

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the power of shitting on your enemy at any tmie

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The power to freeze laptops when you're watching porn and someone comes in.

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The power to have really sweaty palms.

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The power to have two eyes that can't see very far or through anything.

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The ability to read people's thoughts but only in a language that you do not understand.

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The power to change your position whenever you want. (I don't mean teleport I mean you can lay down while sitting or stand up while laying down)

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The power to produce highly concentrated sulphuric acid in your sweat glands.

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The power to die when you get old

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The ability to die on command.

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The power to see in the dark only when the lights are on

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the power to read this sentence

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Immunity to curable diseases.

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the power to never be late to work, but only when you're unemployed.

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The ability to know any language but only after learning it.

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The power to iron your clothes with your mind before putting it in the washing machine

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The power to bet on the fastest horse in the track at a formula 1 competition. Moral: RUN FORREST RUUUUUUN!

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The power to teleport stupid people away from you - but they teleport to YOUR HOUSE.

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The power to detect homosexuality in animals. ~scramjat

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The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

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The power to fuck your moms pussy at will (her opinion or desire means nothing to the will of your useless superpower!). Moral: SONS OF SICKMAN FRAUD REJOICE!

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The power to drink as much tequila as you want without dying.

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The power to jump over any fence no matter how high! Good luck surviving the fall.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!