- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to disguise as an old woman but only with a proper costume and 20 minutes of time in a bathroom to get the make-up done properly.

The ability to not have a super power.

The power to procrastinate so much, you don't even eat, and eventually die.

The ability to push "pull" doors, and pull "push" doors.

you can get lots of pussy, but their all severed

The power to transform money into a foreign currency of lesser value.

The power to rip open my shirt to show a s t-shirt

The power to wear comfortably wear shoes that are way too small.

The power to survive at absolute zero

The power to fly at 0.00000000000000001mm off of the ground at a speed of 1 mile per hour whenever you desperately need the toilet.

The power to not write pointless powers.

The ability to be blind, deaf, and mute at will.

The power to bypass capcha codes

the power to detect when there is oxygen near you

The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times.

The power to breath under water, while your in a submarine.

The power to do control the atmosphere, but only in space.

The power to gain an erection at will but only in front of your mother

The power to travel through time... 1 second at a time

The power to grow your fingernails at 1.5% times the average speed, provided you contribute three hours a day to meditation.

The ability to fart extremely loudly every time you blink - but only when having dinnerwith your girlfriends parents for the first time.

The power to be light and stand against darkness. Moral: FU Destiny!

The power to die at will

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Pointless Super Powers