The power to be able to teleport through a random fat man's colon.

The ability to discharge a battery - JW

The power to make coma patients bark.

The power to moves in slow motion.

The power to invent things as soon as you see them

The power to eat 100kgs of ice cream and only get type 2 diabetes

The power to shoot money out of your hands, but only when your body is on fire.

The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

The power to not being able to go use the bathroom when you have to

The ability to get anyone answer your messages when the answer starts: What the...

The ability too shit out calculators every 10 seconds.

The power to shrink your hand only when its inside a pringles container.

the power to morph into yourself

The power to do something while you can play games.

The power to laught at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

The power to defeat Chuck Norris but only if you can reach the speed of light

The power to walk through walls, but get stuck half way!

The power to kill anyone by hitting them gently on the forehead by yelling "I HIT THIS VICTIM REALLY HARD! I AM A MURDERER HAW HAW HAW! At least 2 times before, then 3 times after the deed.

The power to find the end of the sticky tape

The power to play FPS games in real life (respawning included) but lag a lot

The ability to know when men have erections

The power to have no superpower

The ability to sweat poop.

The power of having a bulletproof appendix.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!