The ability to change your hair color to your current hair color

thumb_up thumb_down +130

The power to ejaculate napalm

thumb_up thumb_down +128

The ability to turn your penis into a vagina... but only if you're a straight man... and you can't change it back...

thumb_up thumb_down +124

the power to attract flying frisbees to your own nose

thumb_up thumb_down +120

The ability to make cheese, only edible to vegans, but only on leap days

thumb_up thumb_down +120

The power to freeze laptops when you're watching porn and someone comes in.

thumb_up thumb_down +112

The power to have two eyes that can't see very far or through anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +110

The power to have really sweaty palms.

thumb_up thumb_down +110

The ability to read people's thoughts but only in a language that you do not understand.

thumb_up thumb_down +108

The power to ramble on and on endlessly with no end in sight with the most inane of thoughts that no one can begin to guess when they will end or what the value or goal of anything so long-winded might be until you find yourself questioning your very desire to go living if you are only going to continue rambling.

thumb_up thumb_down +106

The power to change your position whenever you want. (I don't mean teleport I mean you can lay down while sitting or stand up while laying down)

thumb_up thumb_down +104

The ability to stop only ONE bullet and ONE bullet only

thumb_up thumb_down +102

The power to die when you get old

thumb_up thumb_down +100

The power to produce highly concentrated sulphuric acid in your sweat glands.

thumb_up thumb_down +100

The ability to die on command.

thumb_up thumb_down +96

the power to read this sentence

thumb_up thumb_down +96

Immunity to curable diseases.

thumb_up thumb_down +92

The ability to eat the red ones last

thumb_up thumb_down +90

The power to teleport stupid people away from you - but they teleport to YOUR HOUSE.

thumb_up thumb_down +86

The power to detect homosexuality in animals. ~scramjat

thumb_up thumb_down +84

The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

The power to fuck your moms pussy at will (her opinion or desire means nothing to the will of your useless superpower!). Moral: SONS OF SICKMAN FRAUD REJOICE!

thumb_up thumb_down +80

The power to drink as much tequila as you want without dying.

thumb_up thumb_down +80

The power to give the wrong directions

thumb_up thumb_down +80

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!