The power to teleport stupid people away from you - but they teleport to YOUR HOUSE.

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The power to fold paper seven times

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Reversed telepathy, everyone can hear your thoughts.

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The ability to type with your penis on your smart phone during a video chat.

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The power to speed up time moments before you are about to die.

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the power to to deep fry anything deep fried

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The power to fly simular to a paper air plane. OH SHIT BIRD SHIT COMING IN.

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The power to do control the atmosphere, but only in space.

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The power to turn cake into pie

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the power to have 20/20 vision only when wearing aviators

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The power to take edible shits.

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The power to blink at incredibly fast speeds

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the power to read your own mind

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The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

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you can summon raccoons, but all they do is piss on your shit

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The power to bounce a beach ball with lightly above-average accuracy

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The power to make a woman make you a sandwich

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The power to let everyone around you make a troll face but you are the only one who is able too see it.

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the power to write about pointless super powers in universes that nothing exists.

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THE POWER OF PEDOBEAR!!!!! but only when theres law enforcement around

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The power to get hard at will.

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The Superpower to sleep at night.

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the power to half transform to something.

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The power to change the temperature by 1 degree, once every leap year.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!