the ability to dice a watermelon by looking at it but when you eat any of the diced watermelon a magic watermelon grows in your stomach and you look fat

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The power to shoot money out of your hands, but only when your body is on fire.

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The ability too shit out calculators every 10 seconds.

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The power to speak in only anime openings

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The power to open doors with your bare hands

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The Power to float on water, except when you're wet..

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The power to laught at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

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The ability to stub your toe on every object near you when walking.

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The power to speak only in hashtags. #awkward

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The power to breathe but only when your dead uncle breathes

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The power to iron your clothes with your mind before putting it in the washing machine

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The power to destroy any electronic device seconds after touching itoesajfaokpnhgåpesajfjåaeafjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrroooooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

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The power to tell what a person has eaten by the smell of their farts

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The power to pull any woman that just asked you for a shag.

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The power to open jam jar lids, however stuck they are.

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The ability to have superman's powers and weaknesses, but have an 100% chance to have a suit made of indestructible kryptonite.

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The power to die at will

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The power to shoot projectiles from your eyes to the inside of your head.

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The power to be invisible, but only when no one's looking.

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The power to hear a "SSSSSSSS" sound, then be blown up.

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The power to deconstruct molecules, but only when they're part of an object with a volume of 1 cubic millimeter.

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The power to finish right before you start (If you know what I mean)

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The power to get arrested

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The ability to talk to anybody in the world, as long as they are within your eyesight.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!