to make your bowel work backwards

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the power to put your shoes on faster than you did before

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The power to have hindsight.

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the power to summon a massive midget

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The power to eat your poop

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The power to feel like you're gonna sneeze forever

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The power to instant nose-bleed, but not be able to stop it.

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the power to turn yourself into a toaster. once,

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the power to break the nib of a pencil so that its pointless

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The power to fly 3 inches.

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The power to have a great singing voice, but only in the shower,

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The power to jerk off without using your hands

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The ability to not slip on banana peels

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The power to change the temperature by 1 degree, once every leap year.

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The power to see you're self in a mirror

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the power to slitely change how you look by smiling

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The power to die.

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The power of self-propelled flight, but only when you're the President of the United States.

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The power to give others the power to give others the same power at will.

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The power to fly, but only 1 millimeter above the ground, while moving at a speed slower than a snail.

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the power to disinfect wigs.

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The ability to run faster than the speed of sound, but only when laying down.

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The power of the most useless power and have that power.

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the power to sing like a pro but only when in a bathroom or when autotune is involved...

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!