The amazing ability to shoot any liquid substance out of your eyes, with a requirement being you must douse your eyes with the substance beforehand.

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The power to see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch

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The power to pause time and control every person you touch while the time is paused

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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Be virtually indestructible, but only to things your not paying attention too.

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the ability for things to literally go in one ear and out the other

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The problem to spit bars like a white person with autism

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the power to have the pleasure of sex with out having to do anything to yourself or anybody else!! heckk yes haha

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ability to levitate using my fart...

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The ability to be born, live for about 75 years and then die.

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The power to Grow a baby in a woman.... for 9 months.

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The power to sharpen a pen

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The power to lose body parts by merely thinking about losing said parts coupled together with worry. I.e. I hope I don't lose my testicles.... Damn-it!!

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You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

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the power to change people socks on command

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The power of measuring grains of corn from a large distance.

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The power to scare female plants.

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the power to turn a care package on black ops from dogs to ammo

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The power to turn water into wine.

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The ability to make yourself rich unless you are using it on yourself...

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the power to have 20/20 vision only when wearing aviators

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The power to cause any car accident, but only when someone you love would be in it

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The power to write fast but only when your hungry

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The power to revive people, however it only works on people who commit genocide.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!