The power to wake up one second earlier than everyone else.

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The power to die while dieing

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the power to defecate while standing up...

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The ability to talk to deer, only while riding one.

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The power to have a unique fart smell

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the power to put paper to your nose and blow strange liqeud type substance into it.

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The power to seduce any woman but only if you're gay

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Justin Bieber

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The power to summon a green Hippo that would mush up your poop in your toilet. Oddly, the superpower is only able to be summonded one a year, sorry.

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The power of compulsive lying.

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the power to eat your cereal and milk with a knife

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The power to become the best player in every Moral Kombat game there is. Test your Morals... TSHHH, test your morals TSHHH MORAL KOMBAT! Mortal: FEAR THE WRATH OF MORAL KAHN!

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The power to procrastinate when you ahve an exam coming up

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The ability to shoot apples, but they disintegrate in mid-air. Also, the apples are tiny.

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The power to burst into flames (Like the Human Torch), but immediately burn to death after doing so.

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the power to like Liam Brudenell, That is pointless

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The power to slowly float upward with awesome evil aura whenever you laugh evilly (just like in the movies/anime/etc) Only to realize you are stuck up there until someone gets a crane or something to get you down...

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The power to drink bleach in a gatorade bottle

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The power to teleport randomly anywhere on the planet, once every hour

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The power to actually care what these people are writing.

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the power to absorb gamma radiation, but no resistance to radiation poisoning.

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The ability to talk to bacteria

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The power to give your grandma amazing orgasms.

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the power to read your own mind the power of 75% levitation the power of turning into a juicy pork chop in the presence of a lion the power to believe it is butter the power to turn into a blender once and never change back the power to cry acid the power of turning highly visable while trying to sneak the power to speak, sneeze and cough really loudly and annoyingly the power to teleport half of your body the power to age extremely fast the power to have the patience to write this the power to read all of these d pwer 2 rite stupeedlee the power to thumbs down this (it also makes you look stupid) the power to only speek in sarcasm the power to see the past (not the future) emit eht lla sdrawkcab etirw ot rewop eht

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!