The power to perform incredible feats of strength and speed but only while on an elevator.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

The power to move in slow motion whenever running away from danger. Moral: Hilarious! XD

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The power to become the best player in every Moral Kombat game there is. Test your Morals... TSHHH, test your morals TSHHH MORAL KOMBAT! Mortal: FEAR THE WRATH OF MORAL KAHN!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

The power to have knowledge of your power.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Be dumb and gay like austin Calhoun

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The ability to shoot apples, but they disintegrate in mid-air. Also, the apples are tiny.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The power to light glue on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

the power to win any shit eating contest.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

the power to turn into toilet paper but not back

thumb_up thumb_down +147

the power to see 3 seconds into the past.

thumb_up thumb_down +143

The power to look like yourself

thumb_up thumb_down +133

power to fart through your mouth

thumb_up thumb_down +131

The power to lower the temperature in the room but only if you're cold

thumb_up thumb_down +131

the power to tell have a alarm clock in your head that only go's off evry 30 secents and it deeps for 20 u cant take it owt or stop it lols

thumb_up thumb_down +127

The power to run at the speed of invisibility.

thumb_up thumb_down +127

the ability to grow a boner to an incredible size but only when you are asked to come up to the front of the class

thumb_up thumb_down +127

The power to find any film directed by Uwe Boll entertaining.

thumb_up thumb_down +127

ability to swim like a frog with no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +123

the power to flick a coin and get heads 50% of the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +119

The power to love Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +117

The ability to speak Latin but only when no one can hear you

thumb_up thumb_down +117

the power to guess anybodies breakfast

thumb_up thumb_down +109

Being able to have diarrhea when every you want.

thumb_up thumb_down +109

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!