The power to suck your own dick

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the power to burn your school down from napalm farts.

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The power to have hindsight.

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The power to walk through doors, then open it.

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The power of omniscience but it causes a near fatal heart attack every time you think.

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The amazing ability to shoot any liquid substance out of your eyes, with a requirement being you must douse your eyes with the substance beforehand.

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The power to have 99 problems, except your dog... if she is female.

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The power to do unto others as you do unto yourself

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The power to fly 3 inches.

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the power to fax people with your mind

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The power to make every single person in the world hate you and want you dead.

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You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

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THE POWER TO NOT HAVE SUPERPOWERS! ...............ever

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the power of running at superspeed, whenever you are sat down

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The power to change the temperature by 1 degree, once every leap year.

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The power of fart only in front of cheerleaders

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The power of dying whenever you want.

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the power to have access to unlimited porn but your parents never leave the room

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The power of self-propelled flight, but only when you're the President of the United States.

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the power to be a free wireless hotspot only when you are completely motionless.

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To shit bricks.

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The power to recite all of Encyclopedia Brown's cases in alphabetical order.

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the power to read your own mind the power of 75% levitation the power of turning into a juicy pork chop in the presence of a lion the power to believe it is butter the power to turn into a blender once and never change back the power to cry acid the power of turning highly visable while trying to sneak the power to speak, sneeze and cough really loudly and annoyingly the power to teleport half of your body the power to age extremely fast the power to have the patience to write this the power to read all of these d pwer 2 rite stupeedlee the power to thumbs down this (it also makes you look stupid) the power to only speek in sarcasm the power to see the past (not the future) emit eht lla sdrawkcab etirw ot rewop eht

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The ability to irreversibly turn into a turkey days before thanksgiving.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!