Superhuman strength and endurance but only when sleeping

The power to pull any woman that just asked you for a shag.

The abilty to go through water.

The power to eat ass.

The power to turn yourslef into a suicide bomber just as he blows himself up

The power to self destruct yourself 1 time and 1 time only

The power to grow your pinkie toe to ten times its actual length, but only while your shoes are on.

The power to shoot sperm out of your eyes

The power to not have any power at all

The power to do anything that will not affect anyone but you in any way.

The power to telepathically fold paper.

the power to burn your school down from napalm farts.

The power to blow up, before a bomb next to you blows up.

The power to not get shit dick

The amazing ability to shoot any liquid substance out of your eyes, with a requirement being you must douse your eyes with the substance beforehand.

The power of being pointless

The power to die whenever you feel the slightest bit joyful, happy excited, etc.

power to turn into a shark in zoo cages

The power to die whenever you eat any type of food

The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

The power to be the most beautiful thing ever unless someone watches you.

The power to make really bad jokes: knock knock who's there chicken chicken who no thats an owl not a chicken, you goose!

the power to fly but only 5 feet off the ground and at walking speed.

The power to make grass grow 1cm longer than usual.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!